12:31 am January 31st, 2014

There comes a crossing over point where you start to realize that you've reached that age where people you have admired and grown to love are now on the list of you having to mentally prepare for the day they die. And sometimes moments are filled with close calls. Sometimes too close of calls that should have never existed of people far too young. Or close calls that fate bestowed on an unfortunate soul and shake all those who surround them with fear and abandon. And the close calls that can't yet be called close calls because the result of a surgery thAt hasn't even taken place yet just haven't come back. How dare those damned results that hold fate on a line of numbers on a page claim whether you are to live or die, whether you will be here for all those you've been here for another day. That numbers on hospital letter head can tell you whether the cancer has spread, whether you will live to see grandchildren grow and be support for those who loose loved ones  that it was there rightful time to fade. The order in the worlds heaven, this god we call upon, his priorities are seriously fucked up. But let's pray that that unknown variable will become a close call and not results that cancer have coursed through your whole being. Close calls....unless the call is from above, beckoning you to leave for celestial living. And forcing those still alive grieving. Let's toast to the close calls of tomorrow for not being anything more then that. Good night.